Oops! I Ate It Again

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Happy Keister!!!

Happy Easter! If you don’t celebrate the resurrection, you should at least celebrate the candy. We love Easter candy, except for Peeps. We don’t love Peeps so much. In fact we love to play Warrior with our Peeps. You take two Peeps and put them on a plate and stick toothpicks in the chest of each Peep so they look as if they’re wielding swords. Place in microwave. Turn on microwave and watch the Peeps battle it out! It’s very fun but it renders the Peeps inedible. Well, they were inedible already so no big deal.  Easter candy is fun! We also love to take the Malt Ball brand Robin’s Eggs and suck (or lick) one end. Then use it just like lipstick. The white makes us look like hip, cool seventies chicks. The blue makes us look like zombies. The yellow is just ugly and doesn’t go with anything. The pink is boring. Stick to white and blue for all your Easter fashion needs. You won’t be sorry.

Easter morning was pretty eventful. Brooke nabbed her basket and downed quite a few choice pieces of candy before she remembered the Satan Diet does not allow for such unbridled antics. Remembered. Ha. Sherry is pretty sure she planned it. Smart little Brooke!  Emma, Jake, and Brooke enjoyed an Easter Egg hunt and found most of the colorful, foil-covered eggs. In an annual show of holiday cheer, they split the eggs evenly among themselves. Jake is new to this (being a boyfriend and everything) and thought everyone was just being nice and sharing candy with him as they provided him with “his share” of chocolate eggs. He didn’t notice that Emma only shared her green and blue eggs and Brooke only shared her pink ones.  He generously began sharing his candy until Sherry clued him in. Brooke and Emma simply smiled and took advantage.  Everybody has some memory of Easter candy they try to pass on to their children. Our bunny always tucks some candied orange slices in the baskets. He used to also put in these nasty orange circus peanut things just because that’s what he always brought Sherry. She has fond memories of trying to choke them down as a child. But the kids rebelled and the peanuts were replaced by gummy worms years ago. Gummy worms. Still don’t understand that one.

The Easter dinner of choice was changed to chicken (to accommodate the Satan Diet) so Brooke’s faux pas with the candy did not leave her completely finished dieting for the day. We complimented the chicken with lots of vegetables.

For Easter we thought we’d leave you with a couple of weight loss tips that can really save you calories:

  • If you put something in your mouth that just doesn’t taste good. Remind yourself, “Not worth the calories” and spit it out.
  • If you’re at the store and are dying to buy an impulse item. Think carefully about whether you can afford the calories – then tell yourself “no” in a very firm voice. If it works, you will save both the calories and the money. (Sherry usually buys it anyway. Her inner child is a bit of an anarchist.)
  • If you’re about to put something in your mouth that is high fat or high sugar, remind yourself that it will just be poop in a couple of hours. Imagine what it will look like. You might talk yourself out of eating it because who wants to eat that?
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